A cute, small face with slender, long arms and legs. Japanese men and women favor the style and fashions of Korean women. Eun-jung, 23 years old, is a stylish Korean woman with a fair complexion who has lived in Japan for three years.
From the moment she arrived in Japan, Eun-jung was approached numerous times by Japanese men. She dated several with whom she had a good rapport, but also experienced a number of different cultural shocks. We asked her what those cultural shocks were regarding her relations with just friends and also lovers. (The following is her individual views to our questionnaire).
Fair-skinned and slender - Japanese men seem like they are something out of a comic book!
Eun-jung first told us about the physiques of Japanese men.
“Many young Japanese men have fair complexions and are slender! In Korea, there is military service, so many men are tall and have macho figures. But all Japanese men seem to be slender and many have cute faces that remind me of characters in comic books.”
As you can see from Korean stars, one of the attractions of Korean men is their good physiques. Japanese men, on the other hand, are so slender they look like they could more easily wear ladies’ sizes. Is that perceived as “attractive” or “helpless”? It probably depends on the person...
It’s exciting because there are many Japanese guys who look cute without cosmetic surgery!
Here is another thing that surprised her about Japanese men's looks.
"Korea has a ''plastic surgery'' culture, so even Korean guys think nothing of having a little plastic surgery done. But in Japan, many cute-looking guys have never had any plastic surgery and are not that concerned about looking handsome! When I go to Shibuya and Harajuku, I see many Japanese guys who have double eyelids, high nose bridges, and look like pop idols; they are on another level." (lol)
The same can be said for the "thin body type" mentioned earlier, but it may be a feature of Japanese men that there is a certain number of so-called beautiful adolescent-looking men resembling pop idols.
Sad because special days are not remembered even by Japanese boyfriends...
Eun-jung looked back on some of her previous relationships with Japanese men and told us about them.
“In some ways, Japanese men are kind, but I was shocked because important dates in our relationship did not seem important to them. For example, our third-month anniversary, 100-day anniversary, and dates like that are dates we celebrate in Korea. But there was even one time when he couldn’t meet me even on my birthday because he was too busy with work. I really cried my eyes out then (lol)”
Korean couples are famous for treating anniversary dates like that as something special, but Japanese men don’t seem to care at all. Anniversary dates should be treated as something special!
Are Japanese men insensitive in any other ways towards women?
"Aside from anniversary dates, there were times when I felt that they were a bit insensitive at regular times. When walking in a crowded area, they didn't make an effort to watch for my safety, and when getting on escalators or the train, they would get on first. It was just little things like that, but compared to Korean men I dated in the past, those things stood out.
Listening to interviews with women from other countries about these things, I get the impression that Japanese men don't observe the "ladies first" customs held in other countries, which is a problem. Probably a bit more care should be given to such things in regards to someone you really like.
When you lived together, did your Japanese man help with the housework?
"Sometimes, I stayed at my boyfriend's house, but he never did any housework whatsoever. It seems like even in this day and age, Japanese men seem to think that women should do the housework, which is really an out-dated attitude! In Korea, men will help with such things."
There are, of course, Japanese men who do help out with housework, but there are also men who think "housework is something women should do." Thinking over Eun-jung's experience up to now, I got the impression that Japanese men in her relationships lacked sensitivity.
“Are you OK?” “Are you tired?” Simple expressions of concern go a long way!
Eun-jung told us about several ways in which Japanese men lacked sensitivity, but she also had some good things to say.
"Whenever I looked like I was a little tired, he would always ask, 'Are you OK?' Or ask, 'Would you like to rest a bit?' My Japanese boyfriend would show concern and care verbally. It made me happy because even though he did not express it in his actions, I felt that he was always concerned about how I felt."
Finally, a good point! Japanese men may be good at showing concern with words, even if they are not good at naturally expressing it in their behavior.
The shock when breaking up in a relationship with a Japanese man!
"It seems to me that when a Japanese man loses interest in someone and wants to end a relationship, many become cold and tend to ignore you! There are lots of scenes in Japanese dramas where the man ignores or is cold towards the woman who still loves him. That would be unbelievable in Korea."
When I thought about that, I had to admit that often in Japan, a man who was kind and considerate until yesterday would suddenly turn cold and distant, but I never realized that is unthinkable in Korea. Men need to be more considerate of women's feelings all the time!
Korean women can be shocked by the attitudes of Japanese men. It is painful to hear such criticism, but if Japanese men showed more consideration naturally, they'd probably have a better chance with beautiful Korean women!
*Prices and options mentioned are subject to change.
*Unless stated otherwise, all prices include tax.
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